Michael Schumacher is not the Stig!

posted Jul 31, 2009, 9:54 AM by Quentin Ballard Tremeer   [ updated Aug 1, 2009, 11:01 PM ]
You have to wonder how gullible Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond, James May and the rest of the 400 Top Gear writers,700 camera crew and 2000 managers and admin staff think we are………
 

 I mean really…… do you think that Michael Schumacher would fly to Britain every week to drive ten thousand pound cars owned by somebody else around a track for a minute and then fly back home……….. do they honestly want to convince us that he has moved to the UK………. Why would a millionaire ex world champion want to live in the UK, do business in the UK or even visit the UK………… bad weather, warm beer, the Queen, unfriendly people, tea, Prince Charles, bad weather, rude people, tax, tea, bad weather, people with inflated opinions of themselves, Gordon Brown, mad cow disease, tax, corrupt politicians, terrible beef, warm beer, tea, bad food, bad weather……………… the first or second place to be bombed in a world war………… not surprisingly…

They honestly want us to believe that Top Gear could afford Schumacher’s fee every week…….. far more likely that they could pay him for a five minute appearance to put on a white suit and take off a helmet in studio ONCE……

As apposed to Monaco……… babes, great weather, yatchs, celebrities, sports cars, no tax, fine clothes, fine food, fine wine, fine babes, fine cars, fine whether…………… or Switzerland …… beautiful ski slopes, the last place to be bombed in a world war……………
Is the Stig a girl?
… why do you think Clarkson, Hammond and May test drive cars in other parts of Europe and Asia as often as they can…….. it has got to be cheaper to fly the car to them than to send the fat man, the two long haired midgets and the four hundred camera men and equipment needed to get all those complicated multi view shots to a foreign destination………… I don’t think they even like cars much………. Like most British they just need a small excuse to get away for all the “boring British” that they are slapped in the face with every day living in the Unfriendly Kingdom………………………… check out Schumacher winking at us on set and giving it away…………………..the Stig is actually Damon Hill……... he’s the only guy that you would have to put a full face helmet on for fear of scaring away the large majority of the viewing public from watching your show……. And potentially jeopardize the validity of the lap times that he does………….. he’s the kind of idiot who would drive British cars faster and other cars slower……………..
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The Stig Top Gear crew
 
Jeremy Clarkson thinks Schumacher is the Stig
 
 
Damon Hill is the Stig
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